Leadership in Everyday Life

Throughout my career, I have learned a lot about an important discipline: Leadership.  This is a skill that we can always improve upon, and it can be applied to all aspects of business and life.

When I worked at Graniterock, this was a skill that everyone was expected to learn and practice. We believed that leadership can be demonstrated at all levels of the organization. We all read several books on this subject including a book named “The New SuperLeadership: Leading Others to Lead Themselves” by Charles C. Manz and Henry P. Sims, Jr. SuperLeaders empower, coach, teach, reward, and arrange circumstances to enable followers to lead themselves and enhance their own performance.

A lot of people are surprised when I tell them that you should be a great leader in your life before you become a good leader at your work. The characteristics of leadership are essentially the same whether you apply it at work or at home. 

I believe leadership is a capability that most of us have within. We just need to recognize it and nourish it. It is developed as we tackle the opportunities and challenges of everyday life, and it is measured by our successes and our failures.

Leadership is not about managing people or necessarily being in a position of authority as many believe. In fact, the most powerful form of leadership is when one acts without authority, and lead people who do not have to work for them, think of Dr. Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi.

My definition of leadership is having an uncompromising set of values, a clear desire for a great outcome (vision), being positive & inspiring, empowering & developing the followers, being a great listener, and as a result becoming a role model for others to follow.

As you have seen, all of these qualities are applied by leaders in a work environment as we mostly expect. But more importantly, it can be applied in everyday life with our families, friends, schools, communities and government.

In a family environment, teaching our values, creating a successful vision for our kids, inspiring them to flourish, and being a role model for them, are all crucial in developing our kids to become a valuable member of society. On a personal note, I am reminded every Father’s Day by my kids that how much they value what I have taught them and how they view me as a good role model. This humbling experience is one of my proudest moments.

Practicing leadership is not as hard as people may think. The characteristics that were mentioned earlier can be practiced with your family, friends, loved ones and co-workers. This matures our internal leadership power so that when greater opportunities to lead at work and in society appear, we are ready to lead them commendably. Leadership is also a teachable trait – that is to say, by taking leadership actions we will inspire others to do the same.

And finally, remember that you are already a leader in ways you may not be fully aware of, and never underestimate the influence you have on the lives of people around you. So, let’s take advantage of this and help to improve our families, friends, and our society.

I will write in more details about how to improve leadership skills in the future blogs.

Some Tools for Your Summer Vacation

First, I want to thank all of you who have responded receptively and encouragingly to my first blog. I appreciate all of your kind comments in writing and in person. Second, a lot of you liked the subject and the message of the first blog and have asked me to write more about this topic. I promise to do so in the future. I will also add (when appropriate) a positive quote at the beginning of my blogs to get you inspired. So here is one:

"Having a positive mental attitude is asking how something can be done, rather than saying it can't be done." -- Unknown

Now to today’s blog.

I was going to write an enlightening blog about a new technology this week, but decided to write about traveling instead. Don't worry, I will enlighten you all soon :)

With schools out for the summer, a lot of people are getting ready to go on vacation. We just got back from a vacation to Hawaii, and I thought I would share with you about some traveling apps and gadgets (some of which I used during our vacation) that will make your travel easier.

Since I use Apple iPhone and iPad, my suggestions are based on that system but I am sure most of these apps are also available for Android users as well. So, here are a few tips in no particular order.

1.   TripIt

This is the first app you need before you leave to organize all of your travel information in one place. Add your trip details such as flight information, car rental, lodging, activities, restaurant, and maps to create a full itinerary. No need to search your emails to find the confirmation numbers or print and carry a bunch of papers in your pocket. TripIt can also link to your e-mail account and automatically pick up every confirmation number that comes into your inbox and put them into an organized itinerary. Flight delays and last-minute changes that are sent to your e-mail will be updated in the app.

2.   frē and Nüüd

I leave the pronunciations to you! The last thing you want to happen while traveling is for your iPhone or iPad to break down, especially if you have used Tripit to store everything on them. Who wants the hassle of replacing a phone while vacationing? And who can live without one while traveling? You can protect your gears with Lifeproof frē for your iPhone and Nüüd for your iPad. These covers protects your precious equipment against water, rain, snow, bumps, shocks, dirt and more, without impeding access to the buttons even the camera. Buy at http://www.lifeproof.com/en/

3.   SeatGuru

This is a great app for finding the best seats on your flight. It also offers flight searches and flight status. Once you enter your flight information, it shows you the seating configuration of your plane and which seats are good, or not so good. As you click on any seat, it gives you a review of the seat and its amenities such as leg room, in-seat video options, reclining limitations, and power outlet. SeatGuru has more than 700 aircraft seat maps across almost 100 airlines. SeatGuru is owned by TripAdvisor.

4.   Trakdot

One of the coolest travel gadgets that is also FAA approved is a little battery-powered gadget ($50) that has a built-in GSM chip. Place it in your luggage and it will track your luggage. When you fly, Trakdot Luggage knows and goes to sleep. Upon arriving at your destination, Trakdot Luggage wakes up and reports it’s new location, which hopefully is the same as your new destination. Depending on your preferences, a text-message or email is sent to you confirming that your luggage has arrived with you (or is in some other airport). You can also monitor it on your smartphone or the Web. Buy at http://www.trakdot.com/TrakDot/

5.   Flight Tracker

There is nothing more frustrating than arriving at your airport only to find out your flight has been delayed for several hours or cancelled altogether. The Flight Tracker app will keep you up to date. Now, you can track flights with maps, and receive real-time info on departures, delays, and gate assignments. There is also FlightAware app which has similar functions. One fun thing is you can search the sky in your area for the planes in the air and see their status! If you are on a cruise, there is also shipfinder app which can find and track all the ships around you.

6.   Best Parking

As the name indicates, this is an app that can find and compare prices for public parking lots. While on travel in a new area or a big city, this app can quickly find you a spot to park.

7.   Foodspotting

This is an app for finding the best dishes not just restaurants in your area. With its good visual guide and where to locate it, you can find whatever you’re craving. Of course, it also finds the best restaurants with their reviews around you similar to Yelp. As a bonus, it provides a list of discount coupons for various restaurants in the area.

8.   Eton Boost Solar

This is a handy solar charger that is easy to carry and pack in your luggage. It is sturdy and splash proof so you can carry it around at the beach or at any other outdoor activities. It stores enough juice to revive an empty smartphone twice or a tablet once. It can be charged via a wall outlet or just leave it in the sun, next to your beach seat or on the dashboard of your car! Buy at http://www.etoncorp.com/en

And finally, don’t forget Yelp, Google Translate, Google Maps, GasBuddy, Trip Advisor, and Wi-Fi Finder.

Save a fun and safe trip!

Positivity

I decided my first official blog to be about something that I really believe in, being positive. After all, I have named the title of my blog “Living Life Positively.” In recent years, and may be because I am getting older, I have noticed how much being positive can impact one’s life and outlook.

A few years ago, I stumbled upon Jon Gordon’s weekly newsletters. He is an author and speaker who inspires people, organizations and leaders to work with more vision, passion, positivity and purpose. Last year, he published a book called “The Positive Dog,” a story of two dogs which one teaches the other the power of positivity. After I read it, I bought 25 copies to give to friends and family to help spread the positivity message.

His book is not the only writing you will find about the power of positivity. A quick search on Google reveals that a lot has been written about this subject. So, I decided to share some of my thoughts and findings as well as some of Jon's research about this subject. I don't plan on writing long blogs but this one turned out that way and I hope you take the time to read it.

There are many studies that indicate that positive people are happier, healthier, more successful, and live longer. Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include: lower rates of depression, lower levels of distress, and better coping skills during hardships and times of stress.

A 30-year study of 447 people at the Mayo Clinic found that optimists had around a 50 percent lower risk of early death than pessimists.

Another study found that marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce. I have witnessed this to be the case among several friends. Personally, I can attest that because of Sheri and I’s positive, encouraging and supportive attitude in our lives, we have been blessed by a very successful and great marriage.

In business, positive leaders are more likely to garner the support of others and are able to maintain a broader perspective and see the big picture, which helps them identify better solutions. My late friend and boss, Bruce Woolpert was a great example of such leaders.

Positive people have more friends, which is a key factor of happiness and longevity.

The research also shows that being negative has its own consequences. For example, negative attitude and behavior increase the risk of having a heart attack and stroke. Negativity weakens our immune system, makes us feel more stressed, and drains our energy. It is also associated with feeling more depressed and making fewer friends.

Generally, negative people like to complain and blame others and life for all their problems. There is a quote that says: “complaining is like vomiting. Afterwards the complainer feels better but everyone around him feel sick.” I always try to get away from these people so I don't get drawn into their negativity and stress.

So how do we become more positive? Our way of thinking, whether positive or negative, is a habit and habits can be changed. Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through our head every day. If these thoughts are mostly negative, our outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If these thoughts are mostly positive, we're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking.

The following practices can change our thinking and help us create a more positive attitude.

      Let go of the assumption that the world is against you. It is an assumption that has no basis in reason or science.  The sooner you can attribute your pessimism to a unique set of circumstances rather than the state of the world itself, the easier it'll be to change your perspective.

      Understand that the past does not equal the future.  Just because you've experienced disappointment in the past does not guarantee that everything else that starts badly will end badly.

      See yourself as a cause, not an effect.  Stop thinking about what is happening to you and start thinking about what you can make happen.  If you're not happy with the way your life is now, set goals and get moving!  Use your past negative experiences to learn, build character and make better decisions.

      Remember that life is short. At any time and at any stage of life we could be gone. (I learned this by my Mom’s sudden passing and Bruce’s tragic accident.) Make sure you tell the people you love that you love them today because there might not be a tomorrow. Praise people you care about rather than criticizing them today because there might not be a tomorrow. Give back and make others happy today because there might not be a tomorrow.

      Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you typically think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way, and then expand into additional areas.

      Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people that you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress levels and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.

I am not suggesting that just being positive makes everything work in your life. Positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. You still need to learn new skills, take risks, have patience, be determined, get motivated, have perseverance, be committed, have passion, and most importantly work hard to achieve your life goals. All of this just becomes much easier if your attitude toward your work, people and life in general is positive.

So make a pledge today and turn up the dial on being positive.

Be grateful for what you have because you can't be grateful and negative at the same time. Smile more as it produces more serotonin in your brain as well as the people receiving it. Praise, give positive feedback and compliment others instead of criticizing them. Write a thank you note to someone you care or simply thank them in person. And finally remember life is not happening to you, life is responding to you so choose to make the rest of your life the best of your life.

As some of you may know, I retired from my day-to-day job last October after 31 years of diverse, challenging and rewarding work. This was mainly due to the loss of my good friend, mentor and President & CEO of Granite Rock Company, Bruce Woolpert, who passed away in a tragic accident last year. I was fortunate to have worked for his company for the past 24 years as it shaped and influenced my ideologies and taught me many great lessons in business and life. Now, I am semi-retired and gratefully enjoying life with my beautiful family.

Since these days I have more time, I have decided to share what I have learned over the last 31 years in business and in life. This is my way of sharing and giving back to the family, friends, colleagues and the society that has supported me throughout my career and life. As Winston Churchill said: “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” Currently, I am working with leaders of several companies and coaching them to improve the performance of their organizations which is one way I am sharing what I have learned. I’ll write about this new business venture in later posts.

On the lighter side, another way I want to give back is to write about what I have learned about different subjects and interests through blogging. Throughout my business career, I have learned about organizations, strategies, management and leadership. I like to write about these topics which is universal and can help people in their businesses and in their lives. I also have many other interests and hobbies which I like to write about. So you will see some posts about politics, sports, food & wine, cooking, computer technology, electronics & gadgets, collectibles, traveling, cars & car racing, friendship and most importantly living positively.

I am going to write a weekly blog and randomly select a topic from the list above. Please be patient as I am learning how to blog and use WordPress. I will send you an e-mail announcing when my blog is ready and has been posted. You will have the opportunity to comment and create a dialogue.

I hope you find this useful and share it with others as you wish.

Sanjar